英语作文点评【七年级水平】
来源:学生作业帮 编辑:作业帮 分类:英语作业 时间:2024/05/03 05:02:00
英语作文点评【七年级水平】
假设你们班在举行班会,就主题"长大后我想做什么"展开了讨论,请你根据下面提供的信息写一篇短文,向大家介绍一下你们班同学的梦想.
1.name:Zhao Xiaoming
Wants to be:actor
Reason:interesting
2.name:Wang Gang
Wants to be:policeman
Reason:exciting
3.name:Zhao Na
Wants to be:reporter
Reason:like talking with people
4.name:Han Mei
Wants to be:teacher
Reason:like teaching and children
作文:
Today my classmates are holding the feature about“what do you want to be in the future’’.I am surprised that many classmates want to has all kinds of jobs in the future.
One of my classmates Zhang Ming wants to be an actor,because he thinks the job as actor is very interesting.
And my classmates Wang Dong wants to be a policeman.He is really strong and really tall.He thinks a job as a policeman is very exciting.
Another classmate Zhao Na wants to be a reporter.She likes telling jokes,and she never stops talking.She relly likes talking with other people.
Last my classmate Han Mei wants to be a teacher .She is a good students.She often has high marks in many exams .she likes learning knowledge,and she likes teaching and playing with children .
Wishes them dreams will come ture.
假设你们班在举行班会,就主题"长大后我想做什么"展开了讨论,请你根据下面提供的信息写一篇短文,向大家介绍一下你们班同学的梦想.
1.name:Zhao Xiaoming
Wants to be:actor
Reason:interesting
2.name:Wang Gang
Wants to be:policeman
Reason:exciting
3.name:Zhao Na
Wants to be:reporter
Reason:like talking with people
4.name:Han Mei
Wants to be:teacher
Reason:like teaching and children
作文:
Today my classmates are holding the feature about“what do you want to be in the future’’.I am surprised that many classmates want to has all kinds of jobs in the future.
One of my classmates Zhang Ming wants to be an actor,because he thinks the job as actor is very interesting.
And my classmates Wang Dong wants to be a policeman.He is really strong and really tall.He thinks a job as a policeman is very exciting.
Another classmate Zhao Na wants to be a reporter.She likes telling jokes,and she never stops talking.She relly likes talking with other people.
Last my classmate Han Mei wants to be a teacher .She is a good students.She often has high marks in many exams .she likes learning knowledge,and she likes teaching and playing with children .
Wishes them dreams will come ture.
有几个语法错误:
1.显然这是一个记叙性的文章,所讲述的事情应该是发生在写这篇文章之前,所以,第一句话应该用过去式,而且,开了班会,不需要用“the feature”,用“a feature”即可,所以第一句话应该是“Today my classmates held a feature about“what do you want to be in the future’”,接着第二句话也应该用过去式,而且,want to has是讲不通的,这里可以用want to do,want to have,或者直接want就好,所以这句话应该是:I was surprised that many classmates want to have many kinds of jobs ...;
2.“And my classmates Wang Dong ”,这句话中的classmates不应该用复数,用单数classmate就好
3.“He is really strong and really tall”,第二个really可以不要,这没有对错之分,习惯问题吧,总觉得两个really连着用读起来拗口;
4.“Last my classmate Han Mei wants to be a teacher ”,这里是典型的中国式英语,你应该是想说,最后,我的同学han mei想成为一个老师,但是你这句英文写出来的意思变成:我的最后一个同学han mei想成为老师,好像是其他同学都英勇了,你只有这一个同学了;所以这里,last应该用lastly;
5.“She is a good students”,这里应该用student,不要加s的复数形式,她只是一个人嘛?!
6.“Wishes them dreams will come ture”,这句话有点别扭,而且从句中的一般将来时通常用一般现在时替代,所以这句话应该是:wishes all of them dreams come ture.
如果只是7年级,写出这样的文章个人认为已经是难能可贵了!继续加油,必定会很棒很棒!但是要注意同样的事情不同的叙述最好不要全部使用同样的句式,这样显得比较单调,可以经常换一些表达方式,例如说到他们喜欢什么什么,别总是用like,可以改用love,enjoy等等;
还有,就是加强阅读,你读的东西多了,当你写出一个语法不对的东西时你会觉得不舒服,自然而然就发现了,这就是传说中的“语感”,有了这个东西在加以培养你会天下无敌!
Anyway,祝你越来越强,dreams come true!
1.显然这是一个记叙性的文章,所讲述的事情应该是发生在写这篇文章之前,所以,第一句话应该用过去式,而且,开了班会,不需要用“the feature”,用“a feature”即可,所以第一句话应该是“Today my classmates held a feature about“what do you want to be in the future’”,接着第二句话也应该用过去式,而且,want to has是讲不通的,这里可以用want to do,want to have,或者直接want就好,所以这句话应该是:I was surprised that many classmates want to have many kinds of jobs ...;
2.“And my classmates Wang Dong ”,这句话中的classmates不应该用复数,用单数classmate就好
3.“He is really strong and really tall”,第二个really可以不要,这没有对错之分,习惯问题吧,总觉得两个really连着用读起来拗口;
4.“Last my classmate Han Mei wants to be a teacher ”,这里是典型的中国式英语,你应该是想说,最后,我的同学han mei想成为一个老师,但是你这句英文写出来的意思变成:我的最后一个同学han mei想成为老师,好像是其他同学都英勇了,你只有这一个同学了;所以这里,last应该用lastly;
5.“She is a good students”,这里应该用student,不要加s的复数形式,她只是一个人嘛?!
6.“Wishes them dreams will come ture”,这句话有点别扭,而且从句中的一般将来时通常用一般现在时替代,所以这句话应该是:wishes all of them dreams come ture.
如果只是7年级,写出这样的文章个人认为已经是难能可贵了!继续加油,必定会很棒很棒!但是要注意同样的事情不同的叙述最好不要全部使用同样的句式,这样显得比较单调,可以经常换一些表达方式,例如说到他们喜欢什么什么,别总是用like,可以改用love,enjoy等等;
还有,就是加强阅读,你读的东西多了,当你写出一个语法不对的东西时你会觉得不舒服,自然而然就发现了,这就是传说中的“语感”,有了这个东西在加以培养你会天下无敌!
Anyway,祝你越来越强,dreams come true!