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还有一个星期我就要考雅思了 作文方面急需提高 望雅思大神帮忙改改我的小作文

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还有一个星期我就要考雅思了 作文方面急需提高 望雅思大神帮忙改改我的小作文
table below gives information on consumer spending on different items in five different countries in 2002.
  Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparisons where relevant.
我写的
The table gives a breakdown of how much consumers spent on different items among five countries in 2002.
We can see that food,drinks and tobacco were the main expenditures.In particular,Turkey took up 32.14% of the expenditures.,which was the largest among the five countries.Ranking next was Ireland,with 28.91% of the total expenditures .And the spending in other three countries were all below 20%.
As for clothing &footwear.Italian people may prefer to spend more on dressing(9%).This was followed by Ireland,Spain and Turkey(all at around 6%).The consumption of dressing in Sweden accounted for the smallest proportion(5.4%).
Additionally,consumers among these 5 countries spent rarely on leisure and education.Only 4.35% people’s annual payment in Turkey was into both fields.And the remaining three countries were wholy under 4%.
Conclusion can be clearly reached that among these 5 countries,Irish people tend to spend more on food,drink and tobacco,which tend to be the most popular category of consumer expenditure in the 5countries in 2002.
spent rarely is not an appropriate expression.spent little or very little spend meagerly
Other than that,this short essay deserves to be marked at 7 or above