作业帮请Frank老师解答
来源：学生作业帮 编辑：作业帮 分类：英语作业 时间：2024/05/21 17:35:39
On Saturday morning, I searched the Internet together with my grandparents. As they were concerned with the hotel and the weather in Beidaihe, I helped them at first. After that I learn some detail information about the train schedule.
In the afternoon, I went to the train station to buy the tickets for them. Long as the queue was, I got it successfully within 30 minutes.
After dinner, I helped my grandmother pack the luggage. Besides the clothes they need. I also prepared the map of Beidaihe, an umbrella and two pairs of sun glasses. Nothing was missed.
On Sunday morning, I got up early and went to the train station to see them off. I wish them a safety and interesting journey 麻烦老师按照高考标准评改~谢谢~
In the afternoon, I went to the train station to buy the tickets for them. Long as the queue was, I got it successfully within 30 minutes.
After dinner, I helped my grandmother pack the luggage. Besides the clothes they need. I also prepared the map of Beidaihe, an umbrella and two pairs of sun glasses. Nothing was missed.
On Sunday morning, I got up early and went to the train station to see them off. I wish them a safety and interesting journey 麻烦老师按照高考标准评改~谢谢~
解题思路： 高考作文
解题过程：
On Saturday morning, I searched the Internet together with my grandparents. As they were concerned with the hotel and the weather in Beidaihe, I helped them at first. After that I learn some detail information about the train schedule. In the afternoon, I went to the train station to buy the tickets for them. Long as the queue was, I got it successfully within 30 minutes. After dinner, I helped my grandmother pack the luggage. Besides the clothes they need. I also prepared the map of Beidaihe, an umbrella and two pairs of sun glasses. Nothing was missed. On Sunday morning, I got up early and went to the train station to see them off. I wish them a safety and interesting journey
这是高考命题作文，你按照高考要求写成。总体看语句通顺，句子连贯自然，段落衔接流畅。语篇结构完整、合理。但美中不足的是整篇作文中语句结构较单一，几乎都是简单句，如果在陈述时用上一些高级句式，则效果非同一般。就像Long as the queue was, I got two tickets successfully within 30 minutes这个句子真是精彩之笔。
此外有几处用词不当，给你用红笔列出，并做了修改。 1） were concerned with应为were concerned about/for. 2） I learn some detail information. 应为：I learned some detailed information. 3） I wish them a safety and interesting journey 应为：I wish them a safe and interesting journey 4） I got it successfully within 30 minutes.应为：I got two ticketssuccessfully within 30 minutes.
如果高考满分作文为25分，我的评分当在20分左右。仅供参考。不当之处，请见谅。
最终答案：略
解题过程：
On Saturday morning, I searched the Internet together with my grandparents. As they were concerned with the hotel and the weather in Beidaihe, I helped them at first. After that I learn some detail information about the train schedule. In the afternoon, I went to the train station to buy the tickets for them. Long as the queue was, I got it successfully within 30 minutes. After dinner, I helped my grandmother pack the luggage. Besides the clothes they need. I also prepared the map of Beidaihe, an umbrella and two pairs of sun glasses. Nothing was missed. On Sunday morning, I got up early and went to the train station to see them off. I wish them a safety and interesting journey
这是高考命题作文，你按照高考要求写成。总体看语句通顺，句子连贯自然，段落衔接流畅。语篇结构完整、合理。但美中不足的是整篇作文中语句结构较单一，几乎都是简单句，如果在陈述时用上一些高级句式，则效果非同一般。就像Long as the queue was, I got two tickets successfully within 30 minutes这个句子真是精彩之笔。
此外有几处用词不当，给你用红笔列出，并做了修改。 1） were concerned with应为were concerned about/for. 2） I learn some detail information. 应为：I learned some detailed information. 3） I wish them a safety and interesting journey 应为：I wish them a safe and interesting journey 4） I got it successfully within 30 minutes.应为：I got two ticketssuccessfully within 30 minutes.
如果高考满分作文为25分，我的评分当在20分左右。仅供参考。不当之处，请见谅。
最终答案：略