作业帮为面试准备的英文自我介绍.请英语达人帮忙看看有什么错误,
来源：学生作业帮 编辑：作业帮 分类：英语作业 时间：2024/05/24 23:33:37
为面试准备的英文自我介绍.请英语达人帮忙看看有什么错误,
I am XXX,27 years old...I graduated from Shenyang Aerospace Uunivercity in 2008..I had been a marketing assistant staffing at an electronic company..My main duty is prossesing the orders,analyssing datas,and comunicating with all departments concerned.,And I have the experence of equipments managing...I aquired the ability of comunicating with well because of my work experience...
I am sure that I am qulified for it.First,I have gave you my resume,which details my work experience.Second,not only do my experience makes me a good candidate for it,my serious personality is well suited to working as an assistant..Last,my hobbies include sports and music.and i enjoy clective life...
I know that,maybe I am not the best one ,but I am sure that I must be the most deligent one.If I have the pleasure to work with you,I would try my best to testify that it is a wise decision to hire me.
拼写错误不用帮改了。第四行WITH后面少打了others...笔误。面试生死攸关啊，小弟定会提高悬赏。
I am XXX,27 years old...I graduated from Shenyang Aerospace Uunivercity in 2008..I had been a marketing assistant staffing at an electronic company..My main duty is prossesing the orders,analyssing datas,and comunicating with all departments concerned.,And I have the experence of equipments managing...I aquired the ability of comunicating with well because of my work experience...
I am sure that I am qulified for it.First,I have gave you my resume,which details my work experience.Second,not only do my experience makes me a good candidate for it,my serious personality is well suited to working as an assistant..Last,my hobbies include sports and music.and i enjoy clective life...
I know that,maybe I am not the best one ,but I am sure that I must be the most deligent one.If I have the pleasure to work with you,I would try my best to testify that it is a wise decision to hire me.
拼写错误不用帮改了。第四行WITH后面少打了others...笔误。面试生死攸关啊，小弟定会提高悬赏。
第一行,应该是i was graduated from,还有那个university打错了,然后应该是,I used to be a marketing assistant,后面的staffing可以去掉,直接改成a marketing assistant staffing in an electronic company,department concerned我不太明白什么意思,我建议你把concerned去掉,以前从没见过aquire这个词,查了一下好像也没有,建议改成I have the ability,后面的话不太通顺,比如communicate with well,没有宾语,这句话其实就可以完全改掉,比如可以改成,during the time of my last job,i learned how to communicate well with others后面的一段就不是很适合,你应该更多地写出自己的优点,而不是指望面试官自己去看,我以前专门写过一篇关于怎样在面试中做得更好的文章,截取一段给你看一下,
The most important thing is "be prepared" before the interview.You must know something about the product and the service of the company.You can also try to know some news about the company.Many companies have their own website.You can get some useful information from their website.你可以描述一下你对此次面试的准备,并且描述对这家公司的向往,你最好不要写自己的上任老板不好这一类的话,因为他们会认为你不好相处
还有你第二段的结尾,就不是很合适,你不要讲关于自己生活兴趣爱好的问题,他们才不管这个,你要把自己的工作业绩拿出来,更让人信服,你不要只提自己的经验,因为没有实力作证的人他们是不会要的,deligent这种生僻的词也不要拿出来用,可以用hardworking比较好,还有你千万不要对自己不自信,说自己不是最好的那个,你可以把自己的业绩列出来之后,写i believe that i can stand out of the row because of my hardworking and devotion（敬业）,testify不太好,可以用prove,wise也不要用,直接用good就可以,你太过执著于用一些生僻的词汇来证明你的英语水平,这样不好
楼主,一定要给分阿,全是手打的.
The most important thing is "be prepared" before the interview.You must know something about the product and the service of the company.You can also try to know some news about the company.Many companies have their own website.You can get some useful information from their website.你可以描述一下你对此次面试的准备,并且描述对这家公司的向往,你最好不要写自己的上任老板不好这一类的话,因为他们会认为你不好相处
还有你第二段的结尾,就不是很合适,你不要讲关于自己生活兴趣爱好的问题,他们才不管这个,你要把自己的工作业绩拿出来,更让人信服,你不要只提自己的经验,因为没有实力作证的人他们是不会要的,deligent这种生僻的词也不要拿出来用,可以用hardworking比较好,还有你千万不要对自己不自信,说自己不是最好的那个,你可以把自己的业绩列出来之后,写i believe that i can stand out of the row because of my hardworking and devotion（敬业）,testify不太好,可以用prove,wise也不要用,直接用good就可以,你太过执著于用一些生僻的词汇来证明你的英语水平,这样不好
楼主,一定要给分阿,全是手打的.
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