作业帮求高手给我点评一下英语作文（两个首段）
来源：学生作业帮 编辑：作业帮 分类：英语作业 时间：2024/05/25 20:55:33
求高手给我点评一下英语作文（两个首段）
Recently,we often hear that many college students have mental problems.It is common that mental health played an important role in students’ daily life.It caused a hot discussion in how to improve students’ mental health.
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With the development of social and technology,e-books are more and more popular in people’s daily life.We can reading by e-books almost everywhere at any time because e-books can designed in mp3,mp4,mobilephone and the like.
Recently,we often hear that many college students have mental problems.It is common that mental health played an important role in students’ daily life.It caused a hot discussion in how to improve students’ mental health.
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With the development of social and technology,e-books are more and more popular in people’s daily life.We can reading by e-books almost everywhere at any time because e-books can designed in mp3,mp4,mobilephone and the like.
这2段写的很好,也用了很多亮点加分词汇,像定语从句,还有发挥了重要的作用（play an important part）等等、
不过给点小建议：第一段的第一句,we often hear that （我们经常听说）,这句有一点中国式英语.
可以尝试修改成：近年来,根据心理学家的统计数据来看,越来越多的学生.Recently,according to the psychologist's statistical data
小建议,请自己斟酌,
不过给点小建议：第一段的第一句,we often hear that （我们经常听说）,这句有一点中国式英语.
可以尝试修改成：近年来,根据心理学家的统计数据来看,越来越多的学生.Recently,according to the psychologist's statistical data
小建议,请自己斟酌,
求高手给我点评一下英语作文（两个首段）
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