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请懂英文商务信函书写格式的高手请进 帮我检查下我的信函作业有没有错 谢谢

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请懂英文商务信函书写格式的高手请进 帮我检查下我的信函作业有没有错 谢谢
第一部分是我的信封内容:
Allen Hai Lin
Amoy International Trading Co. Ltd
1 Binhai Road Xiamen,Fujian,361000(我不确定这个邮政编码要不要写)
The people's Republic of China
Mr.John smith
Midland Carpet Co. Ltd
173 Waterloo Street ,London E.C.4
The United Kingdom
第二部分是信的内容:
Amoy International Trading Co. Ltd
1Binhai Road , Xiamen ,Fujian
The people's Republic of China
Tel:(0592) 500 0000 Tax:(0592) 500 0001 Postal Code:361000
Novermber 16,2011
Mr .John Smith
Midland Carpet Co. Ltd
173 Waterloo Street
London E.C.4.
The United Kingdom
Dear. Mr John:
I have noticed your advertisement in the Novermber 10 issue of THE MAGIC CARPET magazine. We would like to find out detailed informations about the various types ,specification and prices ,sample cuttings because we think the patterns might be appeal to our customers , especially the youngers .
We are ready to lay in a stock for New Year sales , it would be helpful if you could supply a booklet , we look forward to receiving your reply in a week.
Yours faithfully ,
Allen Hai Lin
Bussiness Manager
兄弟,人叫John Smith,你可以称呼人家Dear Mr.Smith,或者Dear John
Dear Mr.Smith,
We were much impressed by your advertisement on the MAGIC CARPET magazine.Your wonderful design will be very popular among young people in my country according to our experience.Would you pls kindly offer your specs with best prices and samples?
We are ready to put these into the coming New Year market if your products and prices are proved satisfactory.Hoping that this will meet your prompt attention and awaiting to receive your catalogue.
Yours faithfully ,
Allen Hai Lin
Bussiness Manager
希望帮的上你~