这是一封英文情书请高手帮我修改一下!有些用词不当和语法错误请大家踊跃提出,还有送这封情书是否合适?

这是一封英文情书请高手帮我修改一下!有些用词不当和语法错误请大家踊跃提出,还有送这封情书是否合适?
Yesterday someone asked me why I fall in love with you?I told that:
To speak in oral you meet my appetides;
To speak in refinement I think we are perfect;
To speak in abstraction I am attracted by your external and inherent quality;
To speak in fantasy because we each other had countless glances;
To speak in sincere it is a grace that the god give me;
To speak sickeningly you steal my heart away;
To speak in a delicious way you like a piece of plain chocolate layer cake make feel lingering aftertaste
To speak in a yummy way you like a cup of Bloody Mary brings me into intoxication;
I want to say something more but the one stop me,she had already been gooseflesh all over.She asked me to speak practically,then I told her:
To speak practically is that you are pretty ,cute ,pleasant personality and your laugh out loud impressed me; Although your gesture of spit is somehow crude but it is a signal that you are a direct person ; When I asked you do you tend to leave you told me you had no plan at all ,this thing indicates that you are more strong-mind and toughness than anyone else here; I still remember the time when I picked out the face you gave me a word ‘Wealthy person’ I realize that I shouldn’t show myself off and you have something good that I have not; Although you always saying I will kill you but I still know that you are the last one to do it for the reason that you are so kind-hearted ; and that day when you picked up your pen and write some English words on the paper made me feel… I don’t know how to express ,but from that moment I have been magnetized by you like the decoder magnetized the coins toughly!
After all I said ,I am more envious even jealous of your boyfriend ,never feel so regret that recognize you later than him.But sill,if I had a chance to meet him ,I will tell him all the good things you have and warn him to treat you like treasure,if he didn’t make it ,I will take you from him harshly!

还有,你这是先中文再翻译成英语的吧,何必用这么多生僻的单词,很多都可以换成简单的,你要别人看不懂么,最后一段也太中式了吧!
再问： bingo!的确是先写了中文再翻译的