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英语翻译要一篇英文幽默小说,两分钟左右的,然后针对这篇短文有一个简单的问题,

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英语翻译
要一篇英文幽默小说,两分钟左右的,然后针对这篇短文有一个简单的问题,
I'm Trying to Stop It
"Boy,why have you got cotton-wool in your ear?Is it infected?"
"No,sir,but you said yesterday that everything you told me went in one ear and out the other ,so I am trying to stop it."
“孩子,你为什么用棉花塞住耳朵?它感染了吗?”
“没有,老师.可是你昨天说你告诉我的知识都是一个耳朵里进,一个耳朵里出,所以我要把它堵在里面.”
“I'm sorry ,Madam ,but I shall have to charge you twenty dollars for pulling your boy's tooth .”
“Twenty d ollars!Why ,I understand you to say that you charged only four dollars for such work!”
“Yes ,but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared four other patients out of the office .”
“对不起,夫人,为您孩子拔牙我要收取20美元.”
“20美元!为什么?不是说好只要4美元.”
“是的,但是你的孩子大喊大叫,把另外四个病人吓跑了.”
TWO:Teacher:We all know that beat causes an object to expand an cold cauese it to contract.Now,can anyone give me a good example?
John:Well ,in the summer the days are long,and in the winter the days are short.
老师:我们都知道热胀冷缩的道理.现在,谁给我举个例子?
约翰:嗯,在夏天天都长,在冬天天都短.