Beautiful World

Beautiful World

What is a Beautiful World? Do we live in a Beautiful World? To answer thses perfound questions, we must define what is considered as beautiful. As old proverbs says, " beauty is in the eye of the beholder" This means what is beautiful to some may not be for others. Therefore, our world is only beatuiful when we believe it is. On a appearance level, I think we do live in a beautiful world, becuase many of us dream of travling around the world to see famous sights that we considered as beautiful. However, we're gradually destorying the beauty of our world by various pollutions. Althought we're living more comfortably, earth is being punished by our actions. Also, on a more abstract level, we do not live a beautiful world becuase we're constanly fighting with each other. The ugliness is our ignorance to accept people for who they are. Wars erupt because of differences that can't be solved by words. So we fight with guns, which doesn't solve anything. I hope someday, we'll have the mind capcity to solve our differences with words rather that volience. Only then will we truly live in a beautiful world! （按照15分满分标准......）

解题思路： 思路清晰，文笔流畅，内涵丰富，视野开阔。有难度、有深度，在多处使用了高级词汇和句型，非常好！
解题过程：
本文是一等文，能得14分。作为初中生，能写出这样层次分明、论述全面、思想深邃的文章，说明你的英语功底很深，非常优秀。
现把个别表述不当的地方予以修改：
What is a Beautiful World? Do we live in a Beautiful World? To answer thses profound questions, we must define what is considered as beautiful. As the old proverb says, " beauty is in the eye of the beholder" This means what is beautiful to some may not be for others. Therefore, our world is only beatuiful when we believe it is. On an appearance level, I think we do live in a beautiful world, becuase many of us dream of travling around the world to see famous sights that we considered as beautiful. However, we're gradually destorying the beauty of our world by various pollution. Although we're living more comfortably, the earth is being destroyed by us.
On the other hand, on a more abstract level, we do not live a beautiful world becuase we're constanly fighting with each other. It is foolish for people to refuse to accept who they are. Wars erupt because of differences that can't be solved in words. So we fight with guns, which doesn't solve anything. I hope someday, we'll have the capacity(才能、智能) to solve our differences in words rather than by violence. Only then will we truly live in a beautiful world!
孩子，抱歉，老师不知道这种表达法(On an appearance level)是否正确，但是有另外一个短语也是表达“从表面看”to all appearances，供你参考。
最终答案：略