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哪位大神帮忙看看我的这篇文章的语法或者其他地方有没有问题,3Q

来源:学生作业帮 编辑:作业帮 分类:英语作业 时间:2024/05/14 10:49:21
哪位大神帮忙看看我的这篇文章的语法或者其他地方有没有问题,3Q
Hello everyone,I am your new classmate.We can learn togher.I feel so happy.Well,my name is Weijia.As you can see,I have short hair,just like a boy.My eyes are not big enough.I guess most of you like the big.Because that looked becatiful and loveely.
My favorite color is green,it represents the youth.I like style of music is country music.So,Taylor Swift is my love.And I usually draw some cartoon characters in the boring time.
I like to make friends.I hope we can get alone happy.
Thank you for listening my self introduction.
基本可以,大致帮你润色一些:
Hello everyone,I'm really glad to have such chance here to introduce myself.My name is ...As you can see,I have short hair,just like a boy.Perhaps most of you like the big eyes.But I have to say my eyes are not big enough to make you feel lovely.
My favourite colour is green,it represents youth.The music style I like most is country music and ...is my best love.I usually spend my leisure time drawing cartoon characters in the boring time.
I like to make friends with you and hope we can get alone well / happily.
Thanks for listening.
有几点建议:1.自我介绍一般不介绍缺点,略微幽默式自嘲可以,但需把握个度.
2.句式需再严谨一些,你那句“喜欢的音乐风格”显然不是句子,作为短语结构也较混乱.至于 最后一句话的语病,你仔细看一下,也能发觉,我不在赘述.
3.用词尽量地道,空余时间多用“spare time 或 liesure time.”boring time 很少有人这样用,硬凑“无聊的时间”这是“Chinese English" 的思维模式.