求助这段话的中文意思求助下面这段话的中文意思,Matthew:Without you,I'm as lonely as

求助这段话的中文意思
求助下面这段话的中文意思,
Matthew:Without you,I'm as lonely as an abandoned dog on the side of a highway.I have gift anxiety,even through I don't know when your birthday is.We can spend perfect days shopping and cleaning together.I swear,I'll never make wisecracks when you scrape your tires against the curb while parallel parking.If you consent to live with me,I'll clean the toilet every week.I'll do it with my tongue if you ask.I will strike the words "hooters" and "love rockets" from my vocabulary.I'll love you.Even if your name is Mimi and you want me to pronounce it "May May".I will only pass gas underneath the covers and under the direst of circumstances.Hell,I'll go on a low cholesterol diet.And I won't buy one of those red sports cars when I hit my mid-life crisis.Your parents can come visit us every week,even if your mom is a witch with a capital B.And your folks don't have to go to a retirement home because they can come live with us.I declare,I'll separate the whites from the colors and learn the mysteries of hot and cold water washes.I'll never huff and puff while waiting for you to put on my makeup.If you're a cat person,I'll never point out the fact that a dog can save your life from drowning,but a cat can't.I will happily go see chick flicks with you,like "Pride and Prejudice".I'll make a point to trying new food like okra gumbo.I won't curl my nose at vegetables whose awful taste is disguised by having cheese on it.I pledge to always say "yes" when you ask,"Is my hair looking okay tonight?" I'm gonna bring a whole new meaning to the word "cuddle".I'll be thoughtful enough to read your horoscope every day.I'm gonna save every birthday card you send me!And I'll actually write you real letters when we're apart.I'm never gonna expect you to know where I left my car keys,and I'll never leave my socks on the floor.With me,you'll find the cap is always on the toothpaste.I'll start wearing those bikini style underwear if you like.My belly button will always be lint free.I want to full-on kiss your clitoris.It will be the most passionate,intimate experience you've ever had.I declare now,I will give my life for you.And if you fail to come to me,I know some part of me will surely die.

马修： 没有您,我是一样孤独的,象一条被摒弃的狗在高速公路的边. 我有礼物忧虑,甚而通过我不知道当您的生日是时. 我们可以度过完美的日子一起购物和清洗. 当您刮您的轮胎反对遏制,当平行的停车处时,我发誓,我从未将做说俏皮话当您刮您的轮胎反对遏制,当平行的停车处时,我发誓,我从未将做说俏皮话. 如果您同意与我居住,我每周将清洗洗手间. 如果您要求,我将做它用我的舌头. 我将触击词“警报器”,并且“爱从我的词汇量迅速上升”. 我将爱您. 即使您的名字是Mimi,并且您要我发音它“5月5月”. 我只将通过气体在盖子之下和在最可怕情况之下. 地狱,我在低胆固醇饮食将去. 当我击中我的中年危机,并且我不会买那些红色跑车之一. 您的父母能来每周拜访我们,即使您的妈妈是一个巫婆与资本B因为他们可以来活与我们,并且您的伙计不必须去养老院. 我宣称,我从颜色将分离白色并且学会热和冷水洗涤的奥秘. 我不会威迫并且喘气,当等待您投入我的构成时. 如果您是猫人,我不会指出事实狗能从淹没拯救您的生命,但猫不能. 我将愉快地去看小鸡轻打与您,象“自豪感和偏见”. 我将提出一观点对尝试新的食物象秋葵浓汤. 我不会卷曲我的鼻子在可怕的口味由食用假装乳酪对此的菜. 当您要求时,我承诺总说“是”,
我的头发看起来好今晚?“我给词“拥抱”带来一个整体新的意思. 我将是足够体贴的每天读您的占星. 我保存您送我的每张生日贺卡! 当我们是单独的,并且我实际上将写您真正的信. 我从未盼望您知道何处我留下我的汽车钥匙,并且我在地板不会留下我的袜子.
与我,您将发现盖帽总在牙膏. 如果您喜欢,我将开始佩带那些比基尼泳装样式内衣. 我的肚脐总不起毛. 我想要充分在亲吻您的阴蒂. 它将是您有的最多情,最亲密的经验. 我宣称现在,我将给我的生活为您. 并且,如果您不走向我,我知道某些部分的我肯定将死.