英语翻译Hello,ladies and gentlemen.I’m Sophie Zhu from Class 3 G

英语翻译
Hello,ladies and gentlemen.I’m Sophie Zhu from Class 3 Grade 6.Today,my topic['tɔpik] is,“The Shanghai World Expo”.
First,I’ll say something about World Expo History.As we know,the very first World Expo,the Great Exhibition [,eksi'biʃən] of 1851,took place in the Crystal ['kristəl] Palace ['pælis] in London.UK.Ever since [sins] then,the goals [ɡəulz] of World Expos have been both high-minded ['hai'maindid] as well as commercial [kə'mə:ʃəl].Visitors are able to explore [ik'splɔ:] the world outside of their everyday experience [ik'spiəriəns]—outside cultures ['kʌltʃəz] ,new scientific [,saiən'tifik] advancements [əd'vɑ:nsmənts],and new inventions [in'venʃənz] .World Expos have excited and inspired [in'spaiəd] more and more people in the world.
On December3,2002,the Bureau ['bjuərəu] of International Expositions [,ekspəu'ziʃənz] (or call it BIE) announced [ə'naunsd] that Shanghai will host [həust] Expo2010.the BIE had received [ri'si:vd] bids from five cities to host Expo2010.Among [ə'mʌŋ] the 5 nice cities,the BIE chose [tʃəuz] Shanghai at last!It’s really an exciting news for not only Shanghainese ['ʃæŋhai'ni:z],but also all of Chinese people.Here are some details ['di:teilz] about it.
Look at this profile ['prəufail] carefully.The title ['taitl] is “The 2010 World Exposition ,Shanghai,China ”.This is the logo.
And the theme [θi:m] is “better city,better life”.OK,let’s guess who is the image ['imidʒ] representative [,repri'zentətiv]?------ Yeah,you’re right,Yao Ming!/He is Yao Ming.
Shanghai Expo is the first comprehensive [,kɔmpri'hensiv] World Expo held in a developing [di'veləpiŋ] country.And it is also the first one that takes “the city” as its theme,hoping that it can push forward the city development [di'veləpmənt] and help bring about a better urban ['ə:bən] living environment,just like the theme:better city,better life.
I think,as a student in China,we should learn to be a gentle person and keep good manners ['mænəz] from now on.And try to practice ['præktis] English more in order to communicate [kə'mju:nikeit] with foreigners ['fɔrinəz] fluently ['flu(:)əntli]in the near future.Because,we’re a part of China!

Hello(1),ladies and gentlemen.I’m Sophie Zhu from Class 3 Grade 6.Today,
my topic is,“The Shanghai World Expo”(2).
First,I’ll say something about World Expo History.As we know,the very
first World Expo,the Great Exhibition of 1851,took place in the Crystal
Palace in London.UK.Ever since then,the goals of World Expos have been
both high-minded as well as commercial.Visitors are(3) able to explore
the world outside of their everyday experience—outside(4) cultures ,new
scientific advancements,and new inventions .World Expos have excited and
inspired more and more people in the world.
On December 3,2002,the Bureau of International Expositions (or call it
BIE) (5)announced that Shanghai will(6) host Expo2010.the BIE had received
bids from five cities to host Expo2010.Among the 5 nice cities,the BIE
chose Shanghai at last!It’s really an exciting news for not only Shanghainese(
7),but also all of Chinese people.Here are some details about it.\x14
Look at this profile carefully(8).The title is “The 2010 World Exposition
,Shanghai,China ”.This is the logo.
And the theme is “better city,better life”.OK,let’s guess who is the
image representative?------ Yeah,you’re right,Yao Ming!/He is Yao Ming.
(9)
Shanghai Expo is the first comprehensive World Expo held in a developing
country.And it is also the first one that takes “the city” as its theme,
hoping that it can push forward the city development and help bring about
a better urban living environment,just like the theme:better city,better
life.(9)　
I think,as a student in China,we should learn to be a gentle(10) person
and keep good manners from now on.And try to practice English more in
order to communicate with foreigners fluently in the near future.Because,
we’re a part of China!
注﹕
(1) 也可以考虑用﹕Good Morning/Afternoon,Audience and Judges(如果有裁判
的话)
(2) 不反对这样用﹐但要知道这与正式的名称不同
较为官方的名称是﹕The World Expo 2010 Shanghai
(3) are改为have been
(4)—outside:演讲方面难以向听众表达“—”这个讯息
单靠停顿的效果也不好
可以考虑用",namely,..."来代替"—outside"
因为前文已提及outside﹐所以这个outside可以省略
(5)Bureau of International Expositions
要小心﹐这个名称一半英文一半法文
英文的名称是The International Exhibitions Bureau
(or call it BIE) 可以改为 (or call it the BIE)﹐或(the BIE)
(6) would
(7) the Shanghainese
但要留意﹐有人未必喜欢这个说法
中性及较安全的用词
可以考虑the citizens/residents of Shanghai
(8) 可以加上Please look...(Please take a look at...)
这会较讨好
尤其是演词的结尾是叫人要有礼貌
(9) 这里宜用过去时
以你的写作能力
应当可以应付
不详说
(10) gentle改为 genteel
如果你的意思是指‘有礼貌’的话
中文翻译就留给达人做了
由於我的答覆不完整
所以也不用选这个帖