作业帮老师再次麻烦一下帮忙改错、评分,
来源：学生作业帮 编辑：作业帮 分类：英语作业 时间：2024/05/11 01:53:51
老师再次麻烦一下帮忙改错、评分,
以上是评分标准.
答：
I see that the picture shows us a bird mother who is in the nest looking at her flying children,it is obvious that the bird mother has focused all her energy on teaching her children how to fly and other experience.now,it seems that she is very happy to see her children having mastered how to fly.
i think it is the great mother who teachs them to get some useful skills.obviously,if it weren't for these love,they will not be able to fly.
so ,on no account can we forget our mother and her love,wherever we are in.
大写键盘忘了开,只有第一行是大写了,(请忽略,
以上是评分标准.
答：
I see that the picture shows us a bird mother who is in the nest looking at her flying children,it is obvious that the bird mother has focused all her energy on teaching her children how to fly and other experience.now,it seems that she is very happy to see her children having mastered how to fly.
i think it is the great mother who teachs them to get some useful skills.obviously,if it weren't for these love,they will not be able to fly.
so ,on no account can we forget our mother and her love,wherever we are in.
大写键盘忘了开,只有第一行是大写了,(请忽略,
我打9分,①语法错误较多 ②句式比较单调,没有长短句结合③主语只有I 和It 看起来较为乏味.
但基本上比较完整的描述了图片中的内容.
修改建议 bird mother 改成mother bird
文中两处obvious 用的都有点牵强
the picture shows us a mother bird looking at her flying children in the nest.
focused all her energy on 改成 devote oneself to,focus 一般用在注意力方面
修改建议：She must have devoted herself to the teaching of how to fly and other experience.
master 后最好加技巧,方法,秘诀,.的运用之类,局面等的描述
Now,it seems that she is very happy（建议改成pleased） to see her children having mastered the skill of fly.
i think it is the great mother who teachs them to get some useful skills.
这句话中,前面用了it is ,则为强调句,who 不合理
if it weren't for these love,they will not be able to fly. 虚拟语气 will 改成would
on no account can we forget our mother and her love,wherever we are in.
can 改成shall 去掉最后的in
再问： 请问i think it is the great mother who teachs them to get some useful skills.中的who怎么修改？
还有就是忘了说这是高考题，按9分合理吗？谢谢
再答： 平时最好多向老师请教些长短句式，能够长短结合，你这篇作问立意方面还是值得肯定的，由于语法和用词错误只能在9分左右。
另外，主观的话可以说，但不要一开头就用I think 如果考官不这么认为会怎么样。像这种看图题，首先要描述一个能让大家都接受的事实，然后在根据图片说出自己的一些观点。
还有就是看到你为了让句子看过去有闪光点而有些特意，造成衔接有点不当。
不过，能尽早发现错误是好的，知道自己的不足才会有所改进，你在作文方面细心点，语法首先保证，然后学习些好点的表达，相信作文很快会有所提高。
加油！
再答： 受到
再答： i think it is the great mother who teachs them to get some useful skills.
可以 who 改成that 如果你非要用强调句的话
平时最好多向老师请教些长短句式，能够长短结合，你这篇作问立意方面还是值得肯定的，由于语法和用词错误只能在9分10分左右。
另外，主观的话可以说，但不要一开头就用I think 如果考官不这么认为会怎么样。像这种看图题，首先要描述一个能让大家都接受的事实，然后在根据图片说出自己的一些观点。
还有就是看到你为了让句子看过去有闪光点而有些特意，造成衔接有点不当。
不过，能尽早发现错误是好的，知道自己的不足才会有所改进，你在作文方面细心点，语法首先保证，然后学习些好点的表达，相信作文很快会有所提高。
加油！
但基本上比较完整的描述了图片中的内容.
修改建议 bird mother 改成mother bird
文中两处obvious 用的都有点牵强
the picture shows us a mother bird looking at her flying children in the nest.
focused all her energy on 改成 devote oneself to,focus 一般用在注意力方面
修改建议：She must have devoted herself to the teaching of how to fly and other experience.
master 后最好加技巧,方法,秘诀,.的运用之类,局面等的描述
Now,it seems that she is very happy（建议改成pleased） to see her children having mastered the skill of fly.
i think it is the great mother who teachs them to get some useful skills.
这句话中,前面用了it is ,则为强调句,who 不合理
if it weren't for these love,they will not be able to fly. 虚拟语气 will 改成would
on no account can we forget our mother and her love,wherever we are in.
can 改成shall 去掉最后的in
再问： 请问i think it is the great mother who teachs them to get some useful skills.中的who怎么修改？
还有就是忘了说这是高考题，按9分合理吗？谢谢
再答： 平时最好多向老师请教些长短句式，能够长短结合，你这篇作问立意方面还是值得肯定的，由于语法和用词错误只能在9分左右。
另外，主观的话可以说，但不要一开头就用I think 如果考官不这么认为会怎么样。像这种看图题，首先要描述一个能让大家都接受的事实，然后在根据图片说出自己的一些观点。
还有就是看到你为了让句子看过去有闪光点而有些特意，造成衔接有点不当。
不过，能尽早发现错误是好的，知道自己的不足才会有所改进，你在作文方面细心点，语法首先保证，然后学习些好点的表达，相信作文很快会有所提高。
加油！
再答： 受到
再答： i think it is the great mother who teachs them to get some useful skills.
可以 who 改成that 如果你非要用强调句的话
平时最好多向老师请教些长短句式，能够长短结合，你这篇作问立意方面还是值得肯定的，由于语法和用词错误只能在9分10分左右。
另外，主观的话可以说，但不要一开头就用I think 如果考官不这么认为会怎么样。像这种看图题，首先要描述一个能让大家都接受的事实，然后在根据图片说出自己的一些观点。
还有就是看到你为了让句子看过去有闪光点而有些特意，造成衔接有点不当。
不过，能尽早发现错误是好的，知道自己的不足才会有所改进，你在作文方面细心点，语法首先保证，然后学习些好点的表达，相信作文很快会有所提高。
加油！